In case you haven't already seen it, here's the latest Gatorade spot from TBWA/Chiat. In short, we learn what, "G" is. Golden, glorious, garbage! Compare this work (directed by Spike Lee, btw) to the Jordan v. Jordan v. Jordan piece courtesy Gatorade alum Element 79, and well, you'll see why there's some disappointment about the brand's current direction.

Short of the low production quality, the somewhat ambiguous faces, and the gruff VO, the most difficult aspect to grasp is the brand itself. If we didn't know better, we'd think this was an ad promoting Gamestop or something. Well, maybe not, but to assume that your brand is so strong that referring to a letter and a few notable faces is enough to get the point across is a bit much.

A source close to the campaign tells us the hot and cold reactions this ad has been getting is exactly what Gatorade wants. Could this have been an attempt to get people to think more broadly about the brand? We're told there's much more to come, too.

What we like about the ad is the diverse mix of people, the rough and tumble, deep from the gut emotion that's true to Gatorade. And we would like the lack of visual brand association, were it not so ambiguous. But like we said, that seems to be the point.

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Korey wants you to know that his dancing is perfect for your brand or next agency campaign. In fact, his dancing will "Make Your Ad Campaign an Outrageous Success!!!" At 1:03 minutes, Korey begins showing you his stuff. Around 2:47, he asks you to get up from your desk and crank up the volume. By 7:52, we cut to Korey showing us what he "does for fun on weekends." That's right. It's more erratic dancing. This time at a beach party.

Here's the thing - you have got to admire the fact that dude does not give two poops what you think. He just knows his shit is fly. He's out there, balls to the wall, takin' his mushrooms and rocking out to some Goa trance. And really, who hasn't done a little acid and flailed their bodies around regardless of the actual rhythm?

Clearly, Korey is trying to be the next Matt of Stride Gum fame. But, you know, Matt already had a YouTube following when Stride picked him up. His dance was also pretty darn charming. Come on. It was. Methinks that Korey is a very far cry from chubby, smiling, bring the world together, Matt.

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Just what the ad business needs. Another popularity contest. Welcome to the weird world of America's Next Top Ad Bachelor (ANTAB) - a new competition hosted by an anonymous blogger who is asking for your votes in calling the winner.

"America's Next Top Ad Bachelor follows a group of young men of various backgrounds, shapes and sizes who work together in a America and vie for the title of ANTAB. The competition exposes the transformation of everyday ad men into potentially fierce Adbach's, with participants facing weekly tests that determine who can make the cut."

See? Economic depression spurs creativity. Um, of all kinds. The guys in the running include: TBWA's Rob Baird; Andrew Michaeloff a sales rep at Partizan; Greg Tharp of CP+B and some other guys. I'm all for good fun. I'm all for looking at cute guys, but I beg whomever created this site - make it a little less confusing? Maybe employ an online poll system for voting? How about some commentary on each guy? If you're going to do it and send it around to people, then really do it, you know?

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Objectified is a new documentary from Gary Hustwit who was also responsible for the cult-film fave of 2008, Helvetica.

Objectified focuses on industrial design and delves deep into "personal expression, identity, consumerism, and sustainability. It's about our relationship to mass-produced objects and, by extension, the people who design them." Watch the trailer above and get excited for its early 2009 release.

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In the most serious case of "You've got to be fucking kidding me" marketing we've ever seen or heard, Melrose Jewlers wrote a post on their Web site claiming that Rolex watches "played a major role in Owen Wilson’s recovery ... wearing a Rolex Submariner and attending Rolex Benefits helped Owen Wilson realize his life was valuable and worth living."

Remember that time Wilson slit his wrists in an alleged attempt to take his own life? Apparently, whoever wrote the post thinks that when you're at the end of your rope, fancy material goods will bring you back. What?

Another amazing blurb: "Whatever the hawks of the media choose to write, it is clear that Rolex played a major role in Owen Wilson’s recovery. Back in good form, the actor is nothing less than a comic genius in a time when comedy is a necessity. Wearing a Rolex Submariner and attending Rolex Benefits helped Owen Wilson realize his life was valuable and worth living. Once again, the precision and quality of a Rolex proves to be a lifesaver in more ways than one."

MelroseJewlers.com is a Web site for the Melrose Jewlers, which claims to be the largest importer of Rolex time pieces in the world. A December 15th post on the site contains the audacious claim, along with a number of photos with Wilson wearing various Rolex pieces.

Here's a short list of more likely reasons why Wilson wears the time pieces:

A. He's paid to, by Rolex
B. They were gifts
C. He bought them with his millions of dollars
D. They're fakes he bought in New York
E. He won them in a bet where if he faked suicide, his friend Matthew McConaughey would give him like, 12 of them.
F. They cover the marks on his arms
G. A magical leprechaun popped out of his ass while he was in the hospital and told him that wearing a Rolex would lead him to the end of the nearest rainbow.
H. He robbed Melrose Jewelers

Any of these options would be more plausible for Wilson's Rolex preference. There is no way in hot hell that dude slaps one on because it gives him a reason to live. If anything, watches are a reminder of life's brevity, so we should probably all stop wasting our time and money on useless expensive shit like Rolex time pieces and give up our vapid ways. Where's my whiskey?

Thanks to the Denver Egotist for sharing this with us. We agree with them that this will be a contender for the dirtiest marketing attempt of the year award. And today is January 7th.

Original post/Image

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- The Twitter hacker, GMZ, confesses and tells you how he did it. (link)

- From the tip box: "Word has it Leo Burnett's planning on laying off 10% across LB, Mundocom, Lapiz and Arc in mid-January. Some are saying the 15th."

- Slate examines the relationship between newspapers and electronic content delivery that goes back further than many imagine. (link)

- Whhaa? British consumers pay more attention to print ads than online ads, according to consultancy Deloitte. (link)

- A blog titled, "Skanks In NYC," has led to a lawsuit against Google and anonymous blogging. Gulp. (link)

- Peer39 shuts down their "Semantic Ad Network." (link)

- South African startup airline, Airtime Airlines, applies the cellphone business model to airline ticket pricing. Now, that new. (link)

- Subway launches their mobile ordering program. The associated ad campaign comes from Johannes Leonardo. (link)

- Cuba has created up an electronic collection of Ernest Hemmingway's photographs, letters and manuscripts. Very nice. (link)

- CultureLab has released their trends to watch for in 2009. (link)

- An article chronicling the struggle to rebrand global warming as a "hot" issue. (link)

- What was life like before Crispin Porter? The Denver Egotist spells it out for you. (link)

- Madonna is the new spokeswhore for Louis Vuitton. (link)

- Porn moguls Joe Francis and Larry Flynt are headed to Washington to ask for a porn bailout. I shit you not. (link)

Today, AdMob has launched download tracking for iPhone applications. Advertisers will now be able to track conversion rates for what they're serving up to users. The company also released some insights about the behavior :

- Free applications have an average conversion rate of 10 percent, significantly higher than the average 1 percent conversion rate for paid applications.

- Games generally have higher conversion rates than other categories of apps, up to a 100 per cent improvement over non-game apps at similar price points.

Just a note on AdMob: the company served 4.5 billion ads in September 2008. With the economic downturn, no one is sure if mobile will be effected by the pullback in brand spending. Mobile advertising is still considered "experimental," which means those budgets may have been the first things to see the axe. Like everything else, it's a wait and see game. For more on mobile advertising predications and smartphone sales, check out this article from today's Mediapost.

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The Muslim Ad Network, an online association that concentrates on the Muslim Market in North America, has partnered with advertising strategy firm, Desedo, to create a new advertising agency. Though we don't know what the agency will be called (Desedo is not giving up the goods to us) we are very excited about this new shop.

For starters, the Muslim American market has been valued at $170B according to The New York Times. The Economist also has said that "Two-thirds of Muslim households make more than $50,000 a year and a quarter earn over $100,000." Those are some attractive numbers. Still, it's basically an untouched marketplace. What American brands have seriously tried to engender their loyalty? And yes, in an age where advertising messages can be segmented, an online communities serve every need, a Muslim-American ad agency sounds like the right move to make. Plus, with our first minority President getting ready to be the new leader of the free world, the conversation about race is only going to get louder. Brands would be wise to listen up.

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Submitted for your approval, here is a brief video from Solutions Digitas which, we're told, was shown at a recent global Digitas meeting. The spy who shared it with us notes, "Not to sound ethnocentric but what the fuck is this about?!"

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Raise your hand if you listen to Sirius radio. Anyone, anyone, Bueller? Well, we don't, mostly because of things like terrestrial radio and (as of two days ago), W+K radio (which we've been tweeting here and there: follow AgencySpy). But a quick look at the Sirius Web site and we sorta scoffed. That thing is locked up tighter than a tick in winter.

From what I know about Mel Karmazin, Siruis president and CEO, he doesn't like to give anything away for free. Like, nothing. That mentality, though it jives with his paid-only-product, will kill the already ailing company (which now goes by SiriusXM, even though everything is still pretty separate).

Here's what we think they should do, and we'll use Sirius Hits 1, a pop station that's second only to Howard Stern, as an example.

1. Build a blog, and flood it with content related to your show: Why a blog? Because it's free, it allows users to connect in meaningful ways to your on-air hosts, and shows that Sirius is dedicated to multi-platform content (media-neutrality). Run 1-3 minute clips from each day's shows, like a highlight reel, and offer a click-thru link so people can sign up to listen to the show.

2: Make your on-air hosts write: Or, at least, use a transcript from the show and have an intern create posts out of it. Allow listeners to connect with the people they're listening to. A quick Google Analytics search will tell you that people are looking for the non-existent Sirius Hits 1 blog. They want to connect with you, all 3 million of them, and now that you're merging with XM's pop station, you can expect more people will want to connect.

3. Be Media Neutral: Yes, you're a radio station. However, since your programs are available online, listeners will naturally assume you have other online content to coincide with the pop channel.

4. Post pics and web cam video of your celebrity guests: This content is uber valuable because the likes of Perez Hilton and TMZ will have the opportunity to link to it, further growing your brand and enticing others to, at least, click back to your site — and hopefully buy subscriptions.

5. Sell ads on the blog, and possibly save your brand: Sure, you don't run ads on the radio show, but this is an opportunity to finally earn some ad revenue, to shill other programs, and reach out in ways you currently can't with your shows. Do it like this: find an ad client to run a promo whereby Sirius listeners can enter their password or whatever and get 15% off cogs — announce the promo in one of your radio segments, sit back and watch the CPMs roll in.

Good golly there's a million more things you could be doing to earn some moola, and in light of your economic woes, investing one person in this task to get the ball rolling for Sirius Hits 1 would do more for your station than your limited mind can imagine. Hell, we'll do it for you. We can be reached at agencyspy@gmail.com. Werd.

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You remember that agency, So Nice, that set up an online poll to let visitors to the website decide who would get laid off? The shop said that delinquent clients and the economic downturn was forcing them into layoffs. So Nice then posted the mug shots and biographies of willing employees in a bold PR stunt.

So Nice co-founder Laurent Duffaut said, "It's really a cry of frustration about the unjust choice that we have to make. We are not responsible for what's happening to us."

Turns out that their online gamble has led to an increase in business for the Belgian agency. According to the website, the agency got 15,000 votes from people in 20 countries in less than one week. The clients who hadn't paid their bills coughed up the cash. So Nice no longer needs to let anyone go and in fact, may be looking to take on more bodies with all that new business coming in.

Now, there's a feel good story on this gloomy Wednesday morning.

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Omnicom has selected Tiffany R. Warren, who has been VP-director of multicultural programs and community outreach at Arnold Worldwide, as well as an AdAge Big Tent contributor. Warren also headed up Adcolor - a collective of advertising associations working on that interminable diversity problem.

Warren slides into the role just as advertising is set to come under some serious fire. This Thursday, at 11 AM, the law firm of Mehri & Skalet will hold a press conference on the Madison Avenue Project. This is firm and the NAACP's investigation and possible lawsuit regarding the industry's "long history of widespread racial discrimination.

Mehri has a strong track record for game changing investigations. In 2003, he took on the NFL along with Johnnie Cochran. After the pair completed their in depth look at minorities in the association, the NFL established the "Rooney Rule," which requires all NFL teams to interview at least one minority for an open head coach position.

Could Mehri achieve the same thing for the advertising industry? What if the new rule is that for every creative director position, agencies must interview at least one minority candidate? It's a well known fact that studies have shown "that people with "white-sounding" names are 50 percent more likely to get a response to their resume than are those with "black-sounding" names." It's also well known that there is still disbelief in the business that there even are minority creative directors.

I'm curious to see what happens here and you should be, too.

P.S. Tiffany? We'd love to have an interview with you. If you're game, please contact us at superspyin at gmail dot com.

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Once again, TVNewser's Steve Krakauer invited us comment on the advertising perspective of a few different stories from Mediabistro's morning news feed. Today we joined Krakauer and Fishbowlny contributing editor Glynnic MacNicol, who is wicked smart. It's only 15 minutes, during which we talk about HBO winning the presidential inauguration opening ceremony, Dr. Sanjay Gupta potentially becoming the next surgeon general, and Israel's clamp on journalists entering Gaza.

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A new Web site by R/GA here in New York uses socks, fruit, a white guy and more to show teens how they can avoid certain pressures from their boy/girlfriends. For example, did you know teens pressure their "partners" to send them nude pics via cell phone, or that text message inundation (yo, where u @?) is an issue kids deal with? Neither did we.

The site, ThatsNotCool.com is very viral-wannabe, what with videos like the one you see above, but the AdCouncil project delivers a strong message aimed at empowering pressured teens: communicate with your partner about the issue you're having. Issues include: incessant requests for one's location, for nude photos, mcspace/facebook hacking.

We particularly enjoyed one video where three pieces of fruit (representing teen guys, see it above) are sitting in a basement watching TV when one pipes that he's been talking with Orange, who is apparently hot. His two fruit-bros jibe him to get her to send nude pics. Cue peel joke. When Apple, the dude who's been hanging with Orange says that he's already tried and she doesn't seem to be into it, his buddies suggest he send some "junk" photos to entice her. One day they'll learn that women aren't as enticed by such things as men are, but that's another post.

In the next scene, the apple has peeled his lower skin off, and his buddies begin taking pics of him disrobed. Awk!

This whole phenomenon is summed up as "textual harassment." Remember how we talked about a certain teen whose monthly texts (sent/received) reached more than 28,000 messages in one month alone? The subject of that piece is not unique, though we can't speak to whether or not she deals with the issues R/GA is hashing out.

The site hasn't been officially launched yet, but it is live, so check it out. But, don't tell R/GA we sent you.

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Hot damn. Domenico Vitale, Chief Strategy Officer of Lowe Worldwide, has left the battered shop to form his own agency, People Ideas & Culture. Free at last! Vitale is free at last! So what's the deal:

"People Ideas & Culture (PI&C): A global collective of diverse talent creating, sharing and delivering unbiased solutions as diverse as its members, designed to change with PI&C."

How it works: "The current model in the industry is based on high overhead with a limited, therefore biased, breadth of resources. People Ideas & Culture inverts the model with an expanded breadth of resources and low overhead. Every project is the perfect joint venture to solve a business problem. Not the obsolete AOR model. This new model is about creating true value for both the clients and the agency. The idea is to create the dream team every time, by utilizing the vast array of talent typically not attracted to the big agency model, entrepreneurs and perfectionists in their trade."

What the hell? Wasn't I just bitching about this? Anyway, Vitale is a planner's planner. He's a mentor even. Vitale is kinda Gandalf the Grey of strategy. No, not Gandalf the White. He's gotta battle his own Balrog (the ad industry) before that happens. Pretty sure he's going to pull it off, too.

Congrats to Vitale.
P.S. Somewhere in New York, Mark Wnek is probably freaking the hell out. With Vitale gone, what will happen to Lowe?

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